I am one anxiety-ridden individual. Isn't everyone? I feel like most people in some way, shape, or form have some kind of issue with anxiety, and I am certainly no exception. Between studying, volunteering, observing, and getting ready to apply to grad school while working 25 hours a week, maintaining a healthy relationship with my live-in boyfriend, friends and family, and taking care of two dogs, it's hard not to cry out of pure exhaustion every single day. Maybe I sound like a weenie, but whatever - the last three months have been kicking me swiftly in the ass, and some days I mentally cannot take it.
I had some errands to run on the "other side of the bridge" yesterday (aka the other side of the Tampa Bay). Einstein was due for a grooming appointment, and I had my twice-yearly dentist appointment. JOY! I went to my parents house after said errands for dinner, and I was chatting with my mom about how I've felt like a real psycho lately.
"Where is your happy place?" she asked me.
I laughed and said, "I don't really have one. There is no happy place! It's all terribly unhappy all the time!"
I was mostly joking, but she replied anyway with, "well, you need one. You need to find it, and then you need to mentally 'go there.'"
And she's right. I've been spending a lot of time on what I call my "hamster wheel;" in other words, my wheel of anxiety, and I don't discriminate reasons as to why I might be losing my shit that day. Maybe I feel like freaking out about grad school, or my financial situation, or my relationship, or my laundry, or anything.
So I went home that night and took a bubble bath. I had plenty of studying to do, but I lit one of my new Bath & Body Works candles, opened up a Marie Claire magazine, and soaked for 30 minutes. For a moment, I was stress-free. I didn't worry about anything or anyone.
I'm in the process of creating my own happy places. Whether it's taking 30 minutes in the morning to read a book for pleasure, or making time to work out, or catching up on a television show. My happy place needs to be some place where I can forget about deadlines and remember how to be a real human.