a little blurb about my new job!

I started my job just under a month ago, and my life has been a whirlwind ever since. A learning curve, an adventure, and a big change that I am so happy I made.

I get to work with all sorts of children, from medically complex to mild language delays. I have patients as young as 18 months up to nine years old. I run a social skills group with a well-oiled curriculum twice a week. I work closely with my clinical fellowship supervisor and everyone is so kind and so knowledgable. I pinch myself every day thinking about how lucky I feel getting to work where I work!

On the downside, my days are long (although the Fridays off don't suck). I go into work just 30 minutes later than I did when I was working in the schools, but I stay about four and a half hours longer every day. Because I'm still a clinical fellow, and also brand spankin' new to the hospital and learning all the tricks of the trade, it's pretty typical for me to stay anywhere from a half hour to an hour and a half later than my allowed departure time. This leaves me roughly two to three hours to myself, to spend with Ryan, to get things done every night before I have to go to bed and do it all over the next day.

I ammmmm exhausted.

But I'm happy as a clam. I also know that I'll adjust, get faster at writing notes, get better at prepping materials. I'll never have a moment where I can say to myself, "okay, I know enough now," because I'm learning at least one new thing every hour on the hour. What I am figuring out is that it's okay to say "that's enough for today," and understanding that it might be impossible to have a blank to-do list at the start of every day.

I'm looking forward to getting myself in a routine and on a set schedule. I was in a wedding this past weekend, and before that, I was sick for a few weeks, so it's easy for me to say "I'll get there with time," but if I'm being honest, I just haven't made the time or dedicated myself to creating a routine. 

Any tips for getting on that? Especially when I have just a couple hours to myself each night?

february wrap up | i got a new job!

2019.

A year of change for me, in so many expected and unexpected ways.

Expected: get married in October (woohoo!)
Expected: buy our first home together (hopefully...)
Expected: take a honeymoon some place aaahhhmazing
Unexpected: quit my school-based SLP job just four months after starting and finish my clinical fellowship year at a Johns Hopkins pediatric hospital.

Oh, yikes. Snuck that right in there, huh?

I'm thrilled/nervous/terrified/sad/proud, to say the least. Thrilled because I've landed my dream job just months after graduating. Nervous because I've landed my dream job just months after graduating. Terrified because it's going to be a big change. Sad because I really did love my previous position and all that came with it (my co-workers, the students on my caseload, the days off). Proud because it's a big deal and a great opportunity and I feel incredibly lucky to be able to continue my clinical fellowship year in a medical setting. Lucky, and for lack of better words, PUMPED.

I am now, anyway. I was a blubbering buffoon the night before my interview, and not because of pre-interview jitters, but because of self-imposed guilt. At the time, I'd only been working my job in the schools for about two months; I was enjoying it enough (after the first few bumpy weeks), loved my co-workers, and of course, my students, but I already knew it wasn't where I wanted to be forever. I felt like I was spending more time learning how to complete paperwork correctly versus how to effectively treat my students.

The opportunity to interview elsewhere fell into my lap, and I almost passed up the opportunity because of fear. My fear of being selfish, of looking foolish, of not finishing the job, of letting people down. In retrospect: YIKES. But after seeking advice from family, friends, and previous clinical supervisors, I decided to go for it. What was the harm in interviewing, right? I'd learned about the position a couple months prior; maybe they'd already filled the position. It was a safe bet.

In a nutshell: they hadn't filled the position, I had a call with the director the very next day to set up an interview, and then interviewed four days later. Ten days after that, I was offered the position. Two seconds after being offered the position, I accepted the job. And then I had to start telling people at work, which absolutely terrified me. I was scared of being considered a disappointment. For lack of more eloquent words, it all felt too hard.

But you know what I found out this month?

I can do hard things.

I can break difficult news. I can be selfish and survive the consequences. I can do what's best for me, regardless of opinions. And I am so damn happy about it.

I'm embarking on this new journey, and I know it's because I took the initiative. I know it's because I took a risk, and I have myself to thank for that (and of course my fiancé, friends, and family who pushed me). I'm so thankful for where I started, but thrilled about where I'm going. Change is good, even when it feels big, scary, and selfish. It's okay to be selfish.

adjusting to this new life.

I've been pretty quiet around here, but not because I'm "done" with blogging, or because I don't know what to write about. I actually really miss blogging, and I miss the community that comes along with it. Lately, I've only been active on Instagram which gets a little...eh. We all know how Instagram gets. I actually have a pretty lengthy post drafted regarding actual blogs vs. Instagram blogs, but it's not "there" just yet. Ya know?

Moving right along.

Saying I've been busy doesn't really feel accurate. I mean, it's the truth. But aren't we all busy? Nothing to write home about (or on the blog about, clearly). Given this time of year, we're lucky if we're productive at all, between the parties and shopping and attempting to be mentally present throughout the festivities.

So yes, I have been busy. But in reality, I've been readjusting to the working world; a working world that I wasn't even familiar with while I was working in the life of luxury and flexibility that is an outside sales position. Long gone are my days of hour lunches and a mid-morning Starbucks break to power through the day.

Now, I wake up at 5:35 a.m. every morning (unless I'm really on the edge and hit snooze until 5:45) and I function on one cup of coffee. I drive 30-40 minutes to work in the morning with a 45 minute commute back home. While I have to be on campus (I work at a school) from 7 a.m. to 3 p.m., I almost never leave at 3. I come home, take out the dogs, go to the gym, make dinner, do laundry, hang out with Ryan. Most nights, the clock catches me off guard.

"It's only 8:30," Ryan tells me.

But in a perfect world, I'd be winding down and getting ready for bed at 9 p.m., with a strict 9:45 p.m. bedtime for eight hours of delicious snoozing. In a perfect world. 

On the surface, if you painted this post as a picture, you might reach for dark hues and stroke with a heavy hand, weighted by a litany of woes. That, however, is 100% not my intention. Because while I'm adjusting, I am also growing to love this job.

Even though I'd love to sleep in longer, I don't mind sipping my hot coffee in a cute travel mug while listening to 90's pop or high school punk on my half hour commute.
I live for the days when my 5th grade language students tell me they're excited to learn more about prefixes because they think it will really help them succeed in the classroom.
It warms my heart every time one of my students calls out my name in the middle of a hallway, or runs up to hug me when I pick them up for speech.
I love making sure my kids know that it's a big, exciting, giant, humungo deal when they reach their goals, because I'm figuring out that a lot of these kids don't have that support system at home.

So, you know, things are going pretty well around here. In the new year, I'd like to refocus and start redirecting my energy back into hobbies, such as writing this blog. At the very least, I'd like to figure out its purpose. If you've stuck around during these quiet months, I want to say thank you, and I hope you'll continue to do so.

saying goodbye to restaurant life.

Back in March/April 2015, I decided that I didn't want to work in sales for the rest of my life. In fact, I decided that I didn't want to do anything related to PR, social media, or advertising as a career. I quit my job, started working in a restaurant (again), and began the journey that led me to where I am today.

I remember walking into my first training shift at that restaurant. The weight of this seemingly random, moderately life-altering decision fell on me like a ton of bricks when I was shown "the dish pit." A frequently forgotten staple to a restaurant, it all felt real in that instant. I thought to myself, "oooook, this is my life now." I'd voluntarily exchanged nude pumps for black nonslip flats, accepted primary blue dresses as my weekend evening wear, and started serving tables again.

It was hard at first, and for awhile. Not the job itself, but coming back to it after having "gone corporate." Serving is easy money, but its one of the toughest jobs out there. I've had a finger wagged in my face by guests. I've balled my eyes out back behind the kitchen because of said guests. I've had 12 tables at once. I've refused to serve alcohol to many teenagers (maybe I'll write a blog post on that soon, simply because the stories are killer). I've missed outings and trips to work a brunch shift, where I've actually watched someone throw up allll over the restaurant from too many "bottomless" mimosas. I've been told that no one liked me because I was too "bossy."

But I stuck it out, because 1) I needed money, 2) grad school left absolutely no time to venture out and find a new job/learn a new menu/train, 3) because, for the most part, they worked with my crazy schedule, even when that meant I didn't want to work weekends because I was working 40 hours a week for free at a hospital internship. And of course, because I loved the people I worked with.

Last week, I walked out of my last serving shift. I closed out all my checks, collected cash before passing "go," and said goodbye to my friends.

On Monday, I start my new job as a speech-language pathologist in the schools (and here is one of the speech rooms...it's identical to mine, but this is the other SLP's!).

I feel like I'm gonna throw up, but kind of in the best way. Here's to starting my career (again).

pre-graduation chit-chat

Almost three and a half years ago, I quit my job to begin my journey into speech-language pathology. Nearly two years after graduating college, I abandoned my initial bachelor's in mass communication in exchange for post-bacc classes and a GRE book. That first year was one of the most difficult years of my life - I questioned myself a lot, didn't feel smart enough, didn't feel good enough, cried in the shower, didn't get enough sleep. Once I actually got into graduate school, I did a lot of the same things.

...and now I'm eight days out from graduation and in the process of looking for jobs. Like a real-life, paying, not-working-on-weekends kinds of jobs. How did I even get here?

A lot of my friends have been messaging me things like "you're already done?! that went by so quickly!" And when I look back on my journey, I think the same thing. The days are long but the years are short and all that, right? 

My underlying message beneath my rambling is this: if there's something you want to achieve, but you're worried about the time it would take to complete, just start. Make the sacrifice, take the initiative, and simply begin where you can. The time is going to pass, anyway. As the end of my academic career nears, I rarely think about how difficult it was to get to this point; instead, I think about the light at the end of the tunnel and the future I built for myself. It was all worth it.

Is there something you've been wanting to do, but you're worried about the time commitment? Let me know in the comments!

a long-winded life update

I won't bore you with the monotony of "why I haven't been posting" because I'm sure you know the drill - it's simply been a busy season of life. You know the drill: 32-40 hours a week at my externship, working two nights a week, schoolwork (ish), studying (ish), social life. For awhile there, I just hadn't felt inspired to write about anything going on...it happens!

Side note, this post is a whole lot of rambling, so bear with me.

(I may get hospital heavy here for a second, but I'll move on to other life topics, so just scroll on down if you aren't interested!)

I had the luxury of sleeping in until 8:30 this morning because we've recently discharged patients in our 9 a.m. & 9:45 a.m. MWF slots, which administration has yet to fill...which means I'm drinking coffee on my couch at 9:15 a.m. on a Wednesday. What a life, my friends. It's the little things.

Flash back about four years ago, and working at a hospital is an opportunity I never even knew I wanted to have...but here I am with less than a month left at my first externship, and what a whirlwind it has been.

• I recently had a geriatric patient with aphasia (an acquired disease that causes an individual to lose the ability to express or understand speech from brain damage after a stroke) call me a smart ass. 
• I've had a patient with a severe traumatic brain injury go from naming maybe 1-2 fruits when prompted to list 3 before naming off colors instead...now he's naming 5-6 all on his own without perseverations. 
• I've had patient's husbands and family members cry in sessions when it truly hits that this version of their loved one is their new reality, whether it's their inability to naturally speak after a laryngectomy, or the fact that they can no longer enjoy thin liquids like coffee or regular water because they're silently aspirating (when food & liquid goes down "the wrong pipe" into your lungs, but your brain isn't giving you any semblance of alert...it's super serious and even deadly).
• I shadowed inpatient and acute care for the first time the other day (I'm normally in outpatient rehab)...definitely a different can of worms than I'm used to. I always thought it was kind of cheesy and cliche to tell someone "be thankful for your health." I was naive enough to think that being healthy was simply the "baseline." I am here to tell you: BE THANKFUL FOR YOUR HEALTH, FRIENDS. 

Long story short, I see so much every day - inspiring things, depressing things, stuff that makes me laugh, stuff that disturbs me so deeply that I actually have nightmares about it. It has certainly given me a new perspective on so many things, and for that I am very grateful.

Moving on to not hospital-related items...

I've been reading a lot, and I think I'm starting to like my Kindle more than I like carrying around a real book. Well, to some extent. My little Kindle Paper White fits so perfectly into my scrub pockets, so reading on my lunch break or the shuttle to and from TGH has been my favorite way to pass the time. So far this year, I've read:

1. Eleanor Oliphant Is Completely Fine by Gail Honeyman - loved loved loved it.
2. My Not So Perfect Life by Sophie Kinsella - cute story, light easy read.
3. Once and For All by Sarah Dessen - even though I'm getting closer to 30 years old, I still have a place in my heart for young adult, especially Sarah Dessen. However, was not a big fan of this one.
4. Eligible by Curtis Sittenfeld - entertaining enough, but kind of meh.

For some reason, I've been on a chick-lit kick lately. I think I was getting burnt out on murder mysteries and thrillers because a few months back, I felt so stressed out that I didn't want to add a complicated, mind-twisting fictional story to the mix. Now I'm starting to get a little burnt out "light reads," so we'll see where I end up next!

If you follow me on Instagram, then you know I finally met one of my first blog friends, Chelsea, from The Girl Who Loved To Write. Yes, she is just as superb in person, and I feel lucky to call her a friend! She's as kind and humorous as she comes across in her blog, with a little bit of good-hearted snark around the edges...aka my kinda girl. If you don't follow her already, you should definitely start!

Other things I've been doing/working on/thinking about/doing/getting ready for:

• Tweaking my resume and starting to think about where I want to apply for jobs. Graduation is less than four months away!
• Our upcoming trip to North Carolina for one of my best friends' wedding! I am in desperate need of a little vacation.
• I'm finally caught up on This Is Us (brb, bawling my eyes out), and I just started Life Sentence (okay so far, we'll see if I stick to it). 
• I've been practicing my jump roping every time I go to the gym and I'm starting to get kind of fancy with it. I finally learned how to do a double-under, and I can do three in a row now (sometimes).

What have you guys been up to lately? And if you're a loyal reader (or a new one!), is there anything you'd like to read about on here? Looking for a bit of inspiration around these parts!

recap: my first week of externship!

Two years ago this month, I started volunteering at Tampa General Hospital, a major teaching hospital in my area. By "volunteering," I really mean observing, because aside from sanitizing a few toys here and there, I mostly just sat in the corner and intently watched therapy sessions. I was beginning my second semester of SLP pre-requisites with only a few hours of observation at an elementary school under my belt, so I was still super green in the field and an SLP's scope of practice. In fact, before volunteering at TGH,  I don't think I even realized all that a speech-language pathologist does, especially for adults. Long story short, the adult/geriatric side of SLP is crazy interesting (for me, anyway). From working with neurodegenerative diseases to traumatic brain injuries, head and neck cancer to stroke patients, no day or session is ever the same...and it was while I volunteered that I fell in love.

2018 | the year of graduation + my goals.

Oddly enough, I'm actually thrilled to say goodbye to the holiday season. When October hits each year, I think to myself, "the best time of the year! pumpkins! halloween! ghouls!" Then November comes along, and I think to myself, "the best time of year! a great, big feast! thankfulness! friendsgiving!" Then December rolls around and I'm like "the best time of year! christmas, hanukkah, pretty trees, gift exchanges, all the treats!" By the end of that three month span, I am down for the count.

life update | goodbye to my worst semester of graduate school.

HELLO SWEET PALS OF MINE!

I am officially done with my most difficult semester in graduate school and gooooood lawd did that one put me through the ringer. I won't bore you with all the details, but long story short, I am thrilled to be taking a month off from school (certainly not work...I'm scheduled six days next week - YIKES!).

Advice for your First Year of Speech-Language Pathology Graduate School.

Note: This post is for my fellow or future SLP graduate students! Non-SLP following - you're more than welcome to read on, but if you're not interested, come back later in the week for more travel/personal bits :)

I can't believe my first year of speech-language pathology grad school has already come and gone. I start my second (and final!) year in just a couple of weeks, so I wanted to share a few bits of advice I've gathered from my experience as a first year speech-language pathology student for anyone who's about to start their program this month, or anyone applying in the future! I hope you find this at least a tiny bit helpful as you begin your journey! I certainly don't know it all (I don't think I even know half of it all), but after reflecting on the last year, I've found these to be true:

No amount of observation will prepare you for treating your own clients. Going in, I knew that I had no real idea what I was doing, but I didn't realize how true that actually was...ha! Every client is different, and finding what works while making sure it's an evidence based practice plus making it entertaining for your client (especially the kiddos) can feel especially daunting. But you will learn. Some days you'll want to cry, but you'll always learn!

Staying humble is key. It's no secret that these programs are tough to get into, so it's safe to say that you are one smart cookie! But as a student, or even as a seasoned SLP, you don't know everything (duh!). It doesn't matter how many textbooks you've read, how high your undergrad GPA was, or how many hours of observation you've logged (read above!). Be respectful of your supervisors, keep an open mind to your classmates' ideas, and always be kind. Remember that your supervisors and professors have years of experience with what works and what doesn't and you get to piggy back off that experience...pretty cool, if you ask me! Having said that, never be afraid to ask "why," or to ask if you can try something new.

Finding "your people" (or your person) in the program is so important. From clinical triumphs to formulating appropriate goals, complaining about a tough session or simply wanting to talk about your future profession - there are certain things that your classmates will just understand better than your parents, non-SLP friends, or significant other. These programs are tough, and you'll need someone to bounce ideas off of, to study with, to grow with. You're all in grad school now, so the competition is out the window (heads up - there will still be some people who are competitive AF...I say either kill them with kindness, or ignore them altogether).

Time management time management time management. In some ways, graduate school is a bit easier than undergrad. I can't put my finger on why that is exactly...maybe because getting into grad school is so difficult in itself that once you're actually there, all you have to do is survive. However, it requires a lot of time management. Unlike undergrad, you have to be readily available at any point for a meeting with your clinic group, your supervisor, or a team project. Add in your individual client, making treatment plans and writing SOAPs plus homework (and you know, existing as a human outside of grad school), and you can get overwhelmed real quick. Keeping a planner is important, as is being flexible...like, real flexible.

Understanding what you're learning and actually being able to apply it as a clinician is far more important than getting an A. I know, I know. We want all the A's! But remember that when you're interviewing in the future, they're not going to ask you about your 4.0 GPA - they'll be more concerned with your clinical experiences.

But it's also okay to not be interested in every single thing you're learning. As an SLP, you can wear a ton of different hats over the course of your career, but you probably won't be wearing them all at the same time. So don't feel guilty if learning about swallowing disorders and feeding tubes doesn't appeal to you. You'll find your niche!

You don't have to devote all of your time, energy, and mental space to school. And you shouldn't. Study hard, but make time for fun things and don't feel guilty about it.

Most importantly? Enjoy this time. Even when it sucks (because it will). Your classmates will become some of your best friends - take advantage of getting to see them every single day because you'll miss it when it's gone (AKA like I will be when we're all at different externships & in different classes this semester). 

If you're currently in a program or a seasoned SLP, any tips for incoming first years? Or if you're a graduate student for a different kind of program, what's the best piece of advice you could give, or that you've received? Let me know in the comments!

Graduate School Application Season | For the Future SLP!

March and April are two of the most stressful months for potential graduate students. Schools are dropping acceptances, wait lists, and rejections left and right, and hopeful college seniors all over the world are anxiously refreshing their email inboxes thirty-eight times a day. Call me biased, but I think if you're a CSD major (communication sciences & disorders), it's even more stressful.

Despite the high demand for speech-language pathologists and audiologists, the graduate programs required for these careers are pretty tough to get into, and anxiety levels for students are at an all-time high during application season. Having been rejected, waitlisted, and finally accepted, I thought I would share some insight I gathered from personal experience over the last year:

Accepted! 

Congratulations, the hardest part is officially over. I know I’m gearing this post toward all graduate school applicants, but if you’re a speechie like myself, give yourself a giant pat on the back (and pop a bottle of champs!) because these programs are stupid competitive and you made it. Having said that – now’s the time to drop the competition. If your classmates are waiting to hear back from similar programs, be humble and be supportive! I only had one good friend applying to programs with me last year. One good, brilliant, super humble friend (hey there, Ali!). She was getting into programs left and right and well…I wasn’t. But she was so supportive, caring, and kind to me throughout the grueling process of waiting to hear back. She knew I was an anxious mess nearly 95% of the time, and she gave me so many words of encouragement and genuinely wanted me to be successful. When I eventually got accepted to USF, she was almost just as happy as I was (and I was ecstatic when she got into Vanderbilt!). Application season is rough on everyone…the least you can do (especially if you’ve been accepted!) is to be kind. You never know how badly someone could use some inspirational words.

Waitlisted! 

Being waitlisted to a school is bittersweet, isn’t it? You still have a chance of getting in, but who else is on the waitlist? What’s their GPA? What’s your placement? Is it ranked? When will I know? A month from now? 10 days before the program begins? You’d think I’m being excessive, these are allllll thoughts that were running through my mind daily when I was waitlisted to my current program. It’s exhausting, and a bit daunting. A few pieces of advice when you get waitlisted:

• EMAIL THEM BACK ASAP. Too often, applicants leave their waitlist email chillin’ in their inbox while they wait a few months for the next update to arrive. Do not be one of those people! If you really want to get into that program, say so. All it takes is a simple, “thank you so much, I’m excited to be placed on the wait list, XYZ University is my #1 choice” etc. etc. 
• Send an "addendum" to your application. Note: double check the program's policy on sending in additional documents or updates. If you've completed additional observation/volunteer hours or joined a new major-related campus organization, let them know! This shows that their program is still at the fore front of your mind. Not sure what to say? Here's a quick look at what I sent my program last year while I was on the wait list:
• "As an applicant on the wait list, I wanted to send an addendum to my application. Attached is my updated resume. I believe increasing my number of volunteer/observation hours at ______ attests to the fact that I would be a strong candidate for the program. Also, please let me know if I can provide any additional letters of recommendation. Thank you for your consideration!" 
• Ask about attending the program's open house. Again, this lets them know you're interested!

Having said all that, know when to pump the brakes on your contact. You want them to know you're interested, not crazy...even if that's how you're feeling at the moment!

Rejected...

I applied to a decent number of schools, and I am not ashamed to say that I got rejected from a few. Even if I wasn't dying to get into the program, I wanted them to want me, ya know? Rejection sucks in all forms, and it's okay to acknowledge that...so allow yourself to be sad or upset. Give yourself a night to make fancy drinks at home or get your mind off of it by going out with your best girlfriends. Binge watch Netflix with a large pizza or spend a night curled up with a novel and a cup of tea. Acknowledge any negative feelings you might be having, allow yourself to feel them for awhile, and then do your best to get past it!

• Bonus: After you've gotten yourself together (or if you aren't even the least bit upset, you can do this right away!), shoot over an email or a phone call to the program director and ask their recommendations for re-applying next year. Maybe they were looking for more volunteer hours or a couple extra points on your GRE verbal score. It never hurts to ask, especially if you plan on reapplying during the next application cycle. 

Additionally, remember that these are tough programs to get into, with hundreds of applicants per school. There might always be someone with a "better" GPA or GRE score...so find something to make you stand out even further next time around! Give yourself this next year to work as an SLPA at a local school to save some serious $$$ and look into volunteering opportunities. As tough as it may seem, the only way to get past rejection is to get yourself "back in the game." You got this!

Are you in the process of applying to graduate school? If so, what are you studying?!

Friday Wrap Up | Find Something That Frosts Your Flakes.

[Pictured: my perfect saddlebag given to me by Coach! If you haven't already, check out details on my Instagram!]

It's nearly 2 p.m. on Friday afternoon and I am officially done done done with my first week of my second semester of graduate school! PRAISE THE LAWD. But really, what a jam packed week it has been, my friends. After nursing a 101 degree fever all day Sunday, I was nearly positive I wouldn't even make it to my first round of 8 a.m. - 12 p.m. classes, but I rallied. I also slept...a lot. And after more than twenty hours of classes and orientations this week, it's safe to say that I am ready for even more sleep. Sorry not sorry.

But can I just say that I am so excited for this semester? Honestly. So. Pumped. It's a little too early to say this with 100% certainty, but I'm feeling pretty confident that I want to work with children when I become a speech pathologist next year (NEXT YEAR, GUYS). From gathering materials, to practicing screenings, and reading my new client's permanent file, I just feel elated. Like I get to play for work? I get to read books and play games and this is going to be work? Sign me up! 

Aside from starting up my classes, I haven't had much else going on, so I don't have a whole lot more to say. My closing point today is that, when it comes to choosing a career, find something that truly frosts your flakes. Coming from someone who made a giant career change, it really does make all the difference, and I'm so happy I made the change.

Undergrad vs. Graduate School.

Somehow I'm already halfway through my first semester of grad school, and I'll tell you what: it's entirely different than anything I've done before, especially undergrad (or in my case, post-bacc classes). Obtaining an undergraduate degree is different for every major, but I would say taking classes as a communication sciences and disorders major is one of the most stressful majors out there. Grad school is insanely competitive to get into, and the amount of work to get done while maintaining a nearly flawless GPA is tremendous. But to all you CSD majors out there: grad school is so much better. My mentality has completely changed, and here's how:

Exams

Undergrad: Memorizing facts, statistics, diagrams, formulas, etc. to get a top score on a midterm. Start studying a day or two before the exam, spend the whole night before cramming.
Graduate school: I start studying for exams two weeks in advance, not because I want a 100% (though it wouldn't hurt), but because not only do I need to know the information for a test - I need to actually learn the information. As an SLP, one needs to be knowledgable about the industry; I'm no longer studying for a certain score, I'm studying for my future job.

Sleep

Undergrad: Four hours of sleep the night before a final? #YOLO.
Graduate school: Some days I have three hours of class starting at 8 a.m., followed by group therapy, immediately followed by a session with my individual client. I have to be on top of my game throughout the day, so sleep certainly matters. If it means I have to kick my ass into high gear earlier in the day to get to bed at a decent hour, so be it. Team ALL The Sleep.

Work

Undergrad: I will attend all the classes and get all the A's while also working four nights a week for 4-8 hours per shift! I can make time to study, go out socially, complete volunteer hours, rack up observation hours, and work 20 hours a week. No prob. I hate my life, but no prob.
Graduate school: Working more than 10 hours a week is not recommended. In fact, it's borderline discouraged. I still work one to two days a week, depending what I have going on. I work enough to make ends meet (with the help of my student loans), but it feels so good to always know I have plenty of time to study for a midterm or finish a project without having to worry about someone picking up a shift.

Relaxing

Undergrad: I have zero chill because I'm in the midst of working on my letter of intent, asking for letters of recommendation, studying for three exams spread out over the course of two days, volunteering, tweaking my resume, and picking out where to apply for graduate school (this was literally me around this time last year). Free time? Is that a class, or...?
Graduate school: I'm tired? Run down? Need a break? I'm taking an hour to watch Gilmore Girls, to catch up on reading a novel, to go for a quick run. I'm not letting the semester control me, and I'm going to make time for myself, even if that means setting myself back an hour on my productivity clock.



Then again, this could be a particularly easy semester. Who knows - maybe I'll have zero time for sleep/me time in the coming weeks or next semester. It's still early in the game, but I feel like I have a good thing going on right now.

Hope everyone had a fun filled weekend - here's to a killer Monday! 

On Feeling Inadequate.

Have you ever worked so hard for something, gotten it, only to be borderline petrified once you finally have it? Because that's 1000% been me during my first two days in graduate school.

I worked my ass off in pre-requisite classes last year, observed more than 100 hours of therapy, slaved over the GRE and the overall application process...and it all paid off. I got accepted to my top choice, I'm a graduate student, and in two years, I'm going to be a speech-language pathologist. Wowza.

Despite all that, there's a part of me that still feels out of place. I'm surrounded by so many hardworking women (and a whopping 2-3 men!) and brilliant professors and I'm sitting here thinking, "how did they let my scraggly self in here?" I'm hardly a Type A, I've never been "the very best" at anything, I haven't known that I've wanted to do this my entire life. Was it just dumb luck that they let me in here?!

No. No, no, no, no, no. 

It's so easy to fall into the self-deprecating trap of telling yourself you don't deserve to be where you are and to have what you've worked so hard to have. We deflect compliments and claim dumb luck for our greatest accomplishments. Maybe it's in the name of humility, but maybe it's also a load of crap.

Getting into grad school wasn't dumb luck; it was hard work and well deserved. Quitting my well paying job to go back to school for something new wasn't no big deal; it was a huge effing deal. And I'm realizing that it's entirely okay to feel overwhelmed, terrified, nervous, etc. during a major life change, but it is never okay to let yourself feel inadequate or undeserving when you've worked your ass off to get to where you want to be.

Having said that, I am certainly ready to kick off my first semester of graduate school! Anyone else back in school this week? 

Also, in case you missed it on Instagram, here is my official badge for the next two years! Samantha Rose, graduate clinician...hip hop hurray!

Getting into Graduate School for Speech-Language Pathology.

Note: if you have zero interest in speech-language pathology/getting into graduate school for said field, this might not be the most interesting post for you!

When I made the decision to apply for graduate school (in a field that was 100% different from my initial degree), I knew that quitting my job and going back to serving wasn’t going to be the only difficult part of the journey.

If you’re familiar with speech-language pathology as a field, you know that getting into graduate school is notoriously difficult. Hundreds of students apply for just 20-60 spots, and a good majority of them have phenomenal GPAs. 

Now that I've officially (and miraculously) been accepted to school, I thought I'd put together a list of tips that I believe helped me secure my spot in a great program:

Don’t blow off the GRE. No matter what your friends tell you, spend some time studying for the GRE. For one, it’s a really expensive test to just throw your hands up and see how things go. Learn the strategies, memorize the vocabulary, and take practice tests. I will be the first one to tell you that it’s a stupid test that in no way actually determines how you will perform in grad school. Having said that, it’s a stupid test that will either make or break your application. TIP: Spend a couple hours looking at sample analytical writing essays and prompts. My verbal and quantitative scores were above what I needed when I took the test my first time…and then my analytical writing score came back 12 days later 0.5 points below what I needed. It matters.

Personally, I loved using Magoosh for my studies. I could take full practice exams, and I had access to hundreds of verbal and quant questions. Every single practice question gave a 1-3 minute explanation for the answer, so it was like having my own personal tutor. Definitely worth the money, and it’s considerably cheaper than many other programs.

Immerse yourself in the field. I spent the summer before applying to schools emailing local private practices and hospitals about shadowing their SLPs. I managed to secure a volunteer position at a major hospital here in Tampa for my spring semester (just finishing up my 80 hours this month!), and I formed a great relationship with an SLP practicing at a local school (who ended up writing me a letter of recommendation!). Plus, I spent a couple half days shadowing my friend at the private practice she works at. Not only was I buffing up my grad school application, but I learned so much over the year while getting to work in different settings. 

Get personal with your letter of intent. Even though I’m pretty comfortable with writing, drafting my letter of intent was intimidating. It’s your only opportunity to tell the admission committees exactly why and how you’re different from other applicants…especially if you’re coming from another major or acknowledging a low GPA. I used my background in professional sales and recent observation hours to explain why I decided to pursue speech pathology, and why I felt I would be a perfect fit for the program. Get creative! I also made sure to send drafts to friends and family for review, and quadruple checked for spelling and grammatical errors. In a nutshell – sell yourself, but tastefully!

Reach out early for letters of recommendation. And don’t feel weird about asking for them! Writing letters of recommendation is literally in a professor’s job description. Having said that, reaching out early is key. Again, as a post-bacc, I was in a weird position. Thus, I had to reach out to professors after hardly getting to know them at all. If at all possible, don’t do this. Get involved in research or attend office hours. BUT, do know that it’s completely possible to get a good letter from a professor you don’t have a close relationship with, so long as you’re in good academic standing in the class.

Let them know you’re thinking about them, in a non-suffocating kind of way. As soon as I heard USF was sending out waitlist notifications (in addition to acceptances), I called the graduate school advisor to check in on the status of my application. While talking on the phone can seem scary, it really is so much more personal than an email. Later that week, I was waitlisted. I made sure to reply to the email expressing my continued interest in the school, and then sent an updated resume the following week. I maxed myself out at three separate points of contact, and from there, I [im]patiently waited for my future to unfold…into an acceptance! Of course, there’s no guarantee that reaching out here and there will make a definite difference, but it felt good to know that there was nothing more I could have done to make myself stand out.